Values in Action: Living Your Meaningful Life Even When It’s Hard

Written By Timothy Gordon

Why Values Matter

Why do some people seem to move through life with clarity and purpose, while others feel adrift? It’s not about luck or having fewer problems—it’s about living in alignment with their values.


Values act like an internal compass. They guide your decisions, shape your relationships, and influence how you show up when life gets messy. Unlike goals, which can be achieved or checked off, values are ongoing directions—qualities of living that you can embody anytime.


Think of your values as the invisible blueprint of your life. When you step into them, even in small ways, life feels more meaningful, regardless of external circumstances.

Unearthing Your Core North Stars

Many of us live on autopilot—chasing expectations handed down from family, culture, or society. But authentic values come from within.

Here are two powerful reflection exercises to uncover yours:



  • The Regret Test: Imagine yourself looking back at your life. What choices would you regret not making? These regrets often point to unlived values.

  • The Peak Experience Reflection: Think of a moment when you felt fully alive. What qualities made that experience so powerful? Those qualities likely represent your values.



It’s also helpful to notice the difference between aspirational values (what you think you “should” value) and lived values (what actually guides your daily actions). Growth happens when the two align.



From Belief to Behaviour

Identifying values is only the first step. The real transformation happens when you put them into practice—especially when it’s uncomfortable.

For example, you might value honesty, but that value is tested when telling the truth risks conflict. Or you might value health, but following through means running in the rain or saying no to late-night scrolling.

Living your values often requires leaning into discomfort. And that’s where Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) provides tools for building psychological flexibility:

  • Acceptance: Allow uncomfortable thoughts or feelings without letting them dictate your actions.

  • Defusion: Notice your mind’s chatter (“I can’t do this,” “It’s too hard”) without buying into it.

  • Committed Action: Take steps guided by your values, even when the road isn’t easy.



Why This Matters Most When It’s Hard

It’s easy to follow your values when things are smooth. The challenge—and the growth—comes when life throws pain, loss, or uncertainty your way. In those moments, values provide grounding.

Ask yourself: What kind of person do I want to be in the face of this difficulty? That question shifts you from reacting out of fear to responding with intention.



Bringing It Home: Small Steps, Big Shifts

You don’t have to overhaul your entire life to live your values. Start with one small action:

  • If you value connection, send a thoughtful message to a loved one.

  • If you value growth, carve out ten minutes for reading or learning.

  • If you value kindness, practice patience in a frustrating moment.


These small daily steps add up to a life that feels congruent and meaningful.

Final Reflection

Living your values doesn’t mean life will be easy. But it does mean you’ll be moving in a direction that matters—one step at a time.

As Viktor Frankl once wrote, “Those who have a ‘why’ to live, can bear almost any ‘how.’” Your values are that why.

Tools & Resources to Keep Going

🌱 The ACT Essentials App – Carry practical ACT tools in your pocket. Explore interactive exercises for clarifying your values, practicing mindfulness, and building psychological flexibility. Access the APP


🎥 Latest YouTube Episode – Watch Values in Action: Living Your Meaningful Life Even When It’s Hard with Steve & Jess. We dive deeper into these ideas with stories, reflections, and exercises you can use right now.


📚 Books for Your Journey


Timothy Gordon
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